Christmas Eve carries a lot of weight. For some people, it’s candlelight, family traditions, and a sense of peace. For others, it’s loneliness, regret, and the quiet awareness of who isn’t here. Recovery doesn’t magically remove that weight. In many ways, it makes us more aware of it. One of the unspoken expectations of ChristmasContinue reading “Recovery on Christmas Eve: You’re Allowed to Be Honest Tonight”
Tag Archives: feelings
Anger vs Rage
Anger is one of the most misunderstood emotions we carry. Many of us grew up in homes where anger was either explosive or forbidden, so we learned to fear it, ignore it, or shut it down. But anger itself isn’t the problem. In fact, anger is one of the most important signals in the emotionalContinue reading “Anger vs Rage”
The Role of Grief in Recovery
When most people think about recovery—whether from addiction, trauma, betrayal, or unhealthy patterns—they imagine hope, rebuilding, new habits, and a better future. All of that is true. But there is a part of recovery that often surprises people: you cannot heal without grief. Grief is not just about losing a loved one. It’s about acknowledging anyContinue reading “The Role of Grief in Recovery”
Listening: One of the Strongest Tools in Recovery
Listening is one of the most powerful yet underestimated tools in recovery. We tend to think of recovery as action—meetings, steps, boundaries, new habits—but the skill of listening is woven into all of it. It shapes how we relate to others, how we understand ourselves, and how we move through moments of stress, temptation, andContinue reading “Listening: One of the Strongest Tools in Recovery”
How Argument Connects to Recovery
We often think of arguments as something negative—something to avoid, something that means we’ve messed up, or something that proves we’re not doing recovery “right.” But arguments aren’t failures. In fact, they may be one of the clearest invitations we ever receive to grow, understand ourselves more deeply, and heal old wounds that still surfaceContinue reading “How Argument Connects to Recovery”
Questions in Recovery
Most of us enter recovery searching for answers. We want to know why we did what we did, how to fix it, and when life will start feeling normal again. We want clear steps, guaranteed outcomes, and certainty that all the pain will finally make sense. But recovery rarely begins with answers—it begins with questions. Learning to ask honest questions isContinue reading “Questions in Recovery”
Gladness
Gladness. Last year I had the privilege of officiating my oldest daughter’s wedding. Long before the day, I sat with my daughter and soon to be son-in-law as we worked on the outline for the ceremony. As we talked about what they wanted, who would be in the wedding with them and other associated thingsContinue reading “Gladness”
Guilt
Guilt is a feeling that can produce tremendous good in our lives if it is recognized and processed in a healthy way. Guilt allows us to recognize that we have done something wrong, we have caused harm, we have hurt someone. Let me start with a story from this past week. Wednesday was a difficultContinue reading “Guilt”
Shame
Shame is a feeling of embarrassment or humiliation that comes from the belief that we have done something dishonorable or immoral, or that we have fallen short in our own eyes or in the eyes of someone whose opinion is important to us. The effects of shame can last hours or maybe days but willContinue reading “Shame”
Fear
Imagine with me for a minute that we are on a walk in the forest. We are well into the woods, and we come across a cave. Outside the cave entrance is a pile of bones. Some of the bones appear to be old and dry but some look like they have fresh meat onContinue reading “Fear”