Listening is one of the most powerful yet underestimated tools in recovery. We tend to think of recovery as action—meetings, steps, boundaries, new habits—but the skill of listening is woven into all of it. It shapes how we relate to others, how we understand ourselves, and how we move through moments of stress, temptation, andContinue reading “Listening: One of the Strongest Tools in Recovery”
Tag Archives: coaching
How Argument Connects to Recovery
We often think of arguments as something negative—something to avoid, something that means we’ve messed up, or something that proves we’re not doing recovery “right.” But arguments aren’t failures. In fact, they may be one of the clearest invitations we ever receive to grow, understand ourselves more deeply, and heal old wounds that still surfaceContinue reading “How Argument Connects to Recovery”
Questions in Recovery
Most of us enter recovery searching for answers. We want to know why we did what we did, how to fix it, and when life will start feeling normal again. We want clear steps, guaranteed outcomes, and certainty that all the pain will finally make sense. But recovery rarely begins with answers—it begins with questions. Learning to ask honest questions isContinue reading “Questions in Recovery”
Perfectionism in Recovery: The Trap of “Doing It Right”
I have written before about how perfectionism plays out in our addiction, but perfectionism doesn’t vanish when we begin recovery—it often tags along, hiding behind our desire to “get better.” For many of us, it shows up as the same voice that once said, “You have to hold it all together.” In recovery, that voice shifts to, “You’dContinue reading “Perfectionism in Recovery: The Trap of “Doing It Right””
Staying Grounded Through The Holidays
For many people, November and December are described as “the most wonderful time of the year.” But for those of us in recovery, this season can bring a mix of emotions—some joyful, some painful, and some downright overwhelming. The holidays disrupt routine. Meetings get missed. Sleep and eating patterns change. Suddenly, you’re spending more timeContinue reading “Staying Grounded Through The Holidays”
Boredom
I was in a group recently where the topic of conversation was boredom. It’s rare to come across someone today that doesn’t struggle with it. What I find interesting is that most opinions of the cause seem to revolve around a lack of stimulation. This is obviously a real cause of boredom but in myContinue reading “Boredom”
Smaller Steps
I was talking with a friend recently and he was telling me how discouraged he was. “My recovery sucks. I’m lonely. I feel like I’m going nowhere in life.” I asked the normal questions. How long has it been since you went to a meeting? Who did you call when you were feeling lonely? WhatContinue reading “Smaller Steps”
Gladness
Gladness. Last year I had the privilege of officiating my oldest daughter’s wedding. Long before the day, I sat with my daughter and soon to be son-in-law as we worked on the outline for the ceremony. As we talked about what they wanted, who would be in the wedding with them and other associated thingsContinue reading “Gladness”
Guilt
Guilt is a feeling that can produce tremendous good in our lives if it is recognized and processed in a healthy way. Guilt allows us to recognize that we have done something wrong, we have caused harm, we have hurt someone. Let me start with a story from this past week. Wednesday was a difficultContinue reading “Guilt”
Shame
Shame is a feeling of embarrassment or humiliation that comes from the belief that we have done something dishonorable or immoral, or that we have fallen short in our own eyes or in the eyes of someone whose opinion is important to us. The effects of shame can last hours or maybe days but willContinue reading “Shame”